The Little Things: Finding Light From In The Darkness

When life becomes heavy—whether through grief, trauma, anxiety, or deep emotional pain—it can feel like everything is slipping out of control. Getting through the day can seem impossible. In times like these, we often ignore our own needs. We might feel like we don’t deserve rest, joy, or comfort until we’ve “gotten better.” But the truth is, we don’t heal and then start caring for ourselves. We start caring for ourselves in order to heal.

That healing often starts with something small. Something quiet. Something gentle.

It starts with the little things.

🌿 What Do We Mean by “Little Things”?

The little things are the simple, everyday moments that bring us comfort, warmth, or a sense of connection. They aren’t complicated or time-consuming. They don’t require money, planning, or perfection. But they do require one thing: attention.

Here are some examples:

  • A slow cup of tea in the morning

  • The feel of clean sheets after a hard day

  • The sound of your favourite song

  • A short walk in fresh air

  • Writing one line in your journal

  • Letting your pet curl up next to you

  • Saying “no” to something that drains you

  • Lighting a candle at bedtime

These moments may seem small, but they are powerful. In times of pain, they can help you feel grounded, supported, and even human again.

A little thing of holding a hot drink to help with selfcare, love  and mental health.

💛 Why Little Things Matter When You're Struggling

When you’re facing emotional or traumatic pain, it’s easy to feel disconnected from yourself and the world. You may feel numb, overwhelmed, or stuck in a fog. That’s completely normal—and exactly why these little things are so important.

1. They offer emotional and physical relief

Even short moments of comfort—like holding something soft or listening to soothing music—can calm your nervous system. They don’t erase your pain, but they give your body and mind a break from carrying it all at once.

2. They bring you back to the present moment

Pain and trauma often pull us into the past or into fear of the future. Little things, especially those that engage the senses, bring us back to now. Smelling something familiar, noticing the breeze on your face, or tasting something comforting can reconnect you to yourself in a safe, gentle way.

3. They help rebuild a sense of safety

After a painful experience, your body and mind might feel constantly on edge. Small, predictable routines—like making tea every morning or taking five deep breaths before bed—create a sense of structure and safety. These tiny rituals can signal to your brain: You’re okay right now. You’re safe here.

4. They build self-trust

Trauma and emotional exhaustion can cause us to feel disconnected from who we are. Making and keeping small promises to yourself—like, “I’ll sit outside for 5 minutes today”—can slowly rebuild trust. Over time, you begin to remember that you can show up for yourself, even in pain.

5. They give you reasons to keep going

When the big picture feels too overwhelming to face, little things offer small sparks of hope. You might not know how you’ll get through the month, but maybe you can get through this hour—with your favourite song, a warm drink, or a moment of quiet. Sometimes, that’s enough.

A lady making time to be with her cat to enjoy the little luxuries that her cat gives her.

🕯️ When to Embrace the Little Things

There’s no wrong time to care for yourself. But here are some moments when these small acts of self-kindness can be especially important:

In the morning

Starting your day with something gentle—like music, like stretching, or a quiet cup of coffee—can set a tone of care instead of chaos.

When you feel overwhelmed or anxious

Pause and do one simple thing: drink water slowly, light a candle, or focus on your breathing. Ground yourself in the present moment.

After a triggering memory or difficult moment

Come back to safety through something familiar. A cozy blanket. A favourite scent. A trusted voice. These things can help you re-regulate.

When you feel numb or disconnected

Engage your senses. Touch something textured. Smell something comforting. Listen closely. These sensory experiences gently reconnect you to your body.

At night

Bedtime can be hard for people living with pain or trauma. Create a calming evening routine: dim lights, a warm bath, soothing music, or journaling. This helps your body know it’s time to rest.

Anytime you hear that inner whisper: “I need something.”

That voice matters. Listen to it. Answer with something small and loving.

✨ Make a Gentle Promise to Yourself

Self-care doesn’t have to be perfect or performative. It doesn’t have to look like spa days or journaling for hours. It can be as simple as telling yourself:

“I will let myself rest.”
“I will give myself 10 minutes of quiet.”
“I will sit by the window and feel the sun.”
“I will eat something nourishing.”
“I will ask for help if I need it.”

These promises might feel tiny, but they matter. They are threads of healing, slowly stitching together a sense of wholeness.

🌼 You Are Worth the Little Things

If you’re in a dark or difficult season, please know this:

You don’t have to be “better” to deserve kindness.
You don’t have to be “strong” all the time.
You don’t need to earn rest, safety, or softness.

The little things are not a reward for healing—they are part of healing.

So let yourself have them. Let yourself be held by the ordinary beauty of life. Let the small things remind you that you are still here, still worthy, and still capable of healing—one breath, one soft act, one little thing at a time.

Need more support?
You’re not alone. If you’re struggling, reach out to someone you trust or a mental health professional. And keep returning to the little things. They’re always waiting for you.


The little things that support our self-care, mental health and general wellbeing

Let's talk about how I can support you and help you end the sadness to restore happiness back into you life.

About the Author

Cath Lloyd

British TEDx Speaker, life coach and author of “When Dad Became Joan” and “4 Steps to Emotional Freedom - How to be Happy Again After Painful Life Changes”, Cath Lloyd was a shy and unconfident student at school. Learning from her life experiences has developed her confidence, enabling her to share her voice, ideas, thoughts and feelings.

Cath has spoken on local radio, Radio 5 Live and BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour as well as many podcast shows. Cath promotes the importance of self-honesty in learning and understanding yourself. Self-honesty is the key to communication, keeping your emotional, mental, and physical balance and keeping family life running more smoothly.

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