4 Tips on Getting Back To Basics For Christmas so You Can Ho, Ho Your Way Through The Festive Period.

The hype over Christmas, I think, starts earlier and earlier every year. I am a July baby, and I am sure that one year, not too far in the future, Christmas chocolates will be in the shops before my birthday.

The hype of Christmas can bring not only peace and joy to all men but also other emotions, thoughts and feelings.  There are a lot of other festivals coming up and I am sure this must play out in a lot of other cultural and religious festivals at this time of year and throughout the year.

Up and Coming Festivals

Hanukkah - Jewish Festivals. Also known as the Festival of Lights.
Makar Sankranti and Margazhi Festival - Hindu Festivals
Bodhi Day - Buddhist Festivals
Winter Solstice and Yule - Pagan and Nature-Based Festivals
Ramadan and Eid al-Fitr, Milad un-Nabi (Mawlid) and Kwanzaa - Islamic Festivals
Dongzhi Festival - Chinese celebration of the winter solstice.
New Year Celebrations

Thousands and thousands of pounds are spent via the media promoting products to motivate us or guilt trip us into a spend, spend and spend mindset.  If we spend and buy all these sparkly clothes, perfumes and aftershaves, and have lavish tables of food it is all going to be perfect.  Everyone is going to smile, be merry and have fun.

Or are they?

What is influencing us and how we celebrate Christmas?

However, it isn’t like this for everyone because life takes over. Things get in the way which can put extra pressure on us.

• Some have to go to work and look after other people.
• Unrealistic expectations and spending can put added financial pressure on us.
• Loneliness and grief can loom over us.  Some don’t have family close by or are not able to travel to be with their loved ones and isolation can set in.
• Exhaustion, over commitment and time pressures of buying presents, writing cards, parties and food preparations to make the festive period special and perfect.
• Family dynamics, conflicts, and unresolved issues will play a huge part in how the festive period will be for some. 
• Health issues and the unexpected can hit us and plans have to be rearranged.
• Weather and travelling restrictions on the day may play a part in arrangements.

We all have a story to tell about a celebration that didn't go according to plan.
 

The one I remember was when I was young.  Back then Mum got up very early in the morning to put the turkey in the oven.  We were all excited about our Christmas feast. Mum would get us rallying around organising the dining room table making it special. Later in the morning, my Mum went to check on the turkey but there was a problem.

We had been so busy with what we were doing that we hadn’t noticed that there was no luscious smell coming from the oven.  In my Mum’s haste and probably tiredness she had forgotten to light the gas oven.  My Mum was always great in a crisis, and it felt like a crisis for me and my sister, but this was no sweat for my Mum.  A Christmas lunch of tinned salmon, salad and hot potatoes was rustled up and the Christmas roast was left for another day.

So, you see Christmas day that year was not perfect.  The important thing was that we were together, we all took it as a game, a change in the day and we all remember this with laughs and fun and we had our feast later in the day.  You could say we had two Christmas feasts that year.

What is often forgotten about Christmas?

It’s important to remember that the festive period is often determined by how we play it out in our minds.

We can either micro-manage the day, be totally stressed out and continually worry about what everyone is going to think.

Or we can do the best that we can do and be realistic about how we do it.

One key to making any festive period more enjoyable.

We can manage ourselves, so we don’t resent others for not pulling their weight, worry about not spending enough on presents, or overcommit with people that we don’t want to spend too much time with and be hard on ourselves because of this. 

What can you do to support yourself and make the most of the festive period?

1. Set yourself some boundaries.

2. Practice your self-care and keep to your usual routine as much as possible.

3. Ask for help and accept help when asked - don’t be the superhero. Let other people make the turkey sandwiches, put the kettle on and do the washing up.  Most people can play their part.

4. Remember it’s OK if it isn’t perfect.   Acknowledge them for what they are, accept them for what they are and let the imperfections stay where they are.  Don’t take them with you into the following days and spend time emphasising them by apologising.  If you are more relaxed, then everyone else will be too. The more relaxed you can be the better the great memories.

Many people experience anxiety during the festive period. If you feel that this has left some lasting memories for you, please do get in touch. Let's have a no-obligation conversation to help you start managing your anxiety.   Use the link below to book a call.